 Dr. William A. Ritter Senior Minister |
So
Where Will We Go To Church?
Sermon:
Scripture: |
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During one
of those days in our marriage when we weren’t talking about
anything specific or dramatic, Kris suddenly said: “With the
exception of the years I spent at Michigan State, the question
of where I went to church….or whether I went to
church….has always been decided for me by somebody else.
First, by my mother. Then, by you.” Not that she was
complaining, mind you. Just observing. During the nearly-39
years of our marriage, I suppose she could have worshiped
elsewhere. Or nowhere. Some clergy spouses do. Which is a
hurdle to overcome. But marriages can survive it. And
congregations can make their peace with it. But, in a way that
raises eyebrows, it sends a message. If
you heard my wife’s version of “Forty Years in the
Rearview Mirror,” you know that she has been a church lover
rather than a boat rocker. To be fair, no congregation has
ever said: “Ah, we will get two for the price of one.” But
that’s what four congregations (including this one) have
received. And I am only the first among hundreds who have
reaped the bounty. Now, as retirement looms over the
hill….which, hopefully, I’m not….it seems as if everyone
wants to know where we are going to go to church. Fortunately,
no one has asked if we are going to go to church. The
question is always about location, never intention. Breaking
bread with Knut and Jan Erichsen on Thursday evening, we were
pumping them for information on Norway (given the excursion we
have planned for late July). Somehow the conversation turned
to churches in Norway. Norway has a state church….largely
forgotten but doctrinally Lutheran. Which led Knut to recall
St. Olaf Lutheran Church, where he attended when he first
arrived in Detroit. “It’s still there,” I said, “at
the Wyoming exit of the Lodge Expressway.” I don’t know
whether it’s still open….or still Lutheran….but given
Kris’ burgeoning interest in things Norwegian (after all,
her maiden name is Larson), I think we’ll mosey down there
this summer, just to check it out. Yet,
how odd it feels to have lived this long….and gotten this
old….without ever having had to seek out a church. Which
differentiates us from many of you who did it early and, in
some cases, often. So how did you go about it….the choosing,
I mean? There
are people whose business it is to research such questions.
And the people in my business, if we are smart, pay close
attention to what the people in the research business tell us.
For they are telling us that it’s a whole new ballgame out
there. People choose churches today for far different reasons
than people chose churches yesterday. High on the list of
yesterday’s reasons were family ancestry, geographic
proximity and denominational identity. None of which counts
for much of anything anymore. Family
ancestry suggests that you will go to church where your
parents went to church (or, in some cases, where your parents
are still going to church). And it is wonderful to have
multiple generations of the same family in the same sanctuary.
Which still happens here. But less often,
elsewhere….Birmingham being something of a throw-back town,
and First Church being something of a throw-back church. Geographic
proximity, meanwhile, suggests that, upon moving into a new
community, you will choose a church that is close by. A church
where the commute is minimal. A church your kids can walk to.
A church where your children see the same kids in Sunday
school that they see in public school. In short, a
neighborhood parish. Which Roman Catholics modeled….and, to
some degree, mandated….for decades. But that pattern is
breaking down, even for Roman Catholics. The automobile has
made venturers of us all. Denominational
identity was also a bigger factor once than it is
now….especially now that denominational identity is no
longer underscored by ethnicity. It was one thing to be a
Lutheran. It was quite another thing to be a German Lutheran.
I love being Methodist. I was born into it…. called to serve
out of it….and thoroughly acculturated within it. But even
my loyalty is suspect, given that you can explain it
professionally. Still, free to choose, I would never bite the
hand that fed me. But my breed is vanishing. Today,
people shop….everywhere….for everything. Church is a
commodity. Church seekers are consumers of commodities.
Especially in suburbia, where the options are multiple and the
access, available. We have Methodist preachers who don’t
want to come anywhere near metropolitan Detroit. Not because
the environment is so congestive, but because the church scene
is so competitive. They prefer small towns where every church
has its corner….its niche….and will pretty much be today
what it was yesterday. Yet, even there, tides are turning and
change is coming. Meanwhile, here in Birmingham, you have
seven United Methodist alternatives within five miles and
fourteen additional alternatives within ten miles. But the
biggest swath is being cut by churches with no denominational
connections at all. Or, if they have a denominational
connection, they hide it from view….by dropping it from
their name or erasing it from their sign. So
how do people decide where it is they want to go? Well, there
are a few benchmarks that have been around for a long time and
still play at least a small part. Building being one. A lot of
people still say: “I like the look of that place. Let’s
try there.” But looks are deceiving. Not everybody who takes
the pretty girl to the prom, marries the pretty girl after the
prom. And, in surveying the local landscape, I have noticed
that some of the churches growing the fastest, strike my eye
as being the plainest. If all it took was a building, the Kirk
would be burgeoning. Preaching,
that’s important. Great preaching, even more so. Except not
everybody agrees what great preaching is, or knows it when
they hear it. Preaching can bring the shopper back for a
second look. Maybe even for a third look. But in relatively
few cases can preaching close the deal or nail the commitment.
Ditto for music….even great music. That’s because the
waterfront is widening. And no one choir, organist, praise
band or gospel quartet can cover it all. Even theology, while
pivotal to many, is no guarantee. At the extreme ends of the
spectrum, very fundamental and very liberal people prefer to
cluster with their own. And only their own. But the vast
number of churches in between house populations that defy
categorization. And while differences in theology lead those
churches to struggle (and even quarrel), they go on surviving
and serving with an authenticity that is not dependent upon
agreement. Jesus
said nigh-unto-nothing about church shopping. Jesus was a Jew.
Born a Jew. Died a Jew. And virtually all his followers in
first century Israel remained in synagogues. Concerning Jewish
life, Jesus observed it. Concerning Jewish religion, Jesus
practiced it. I can point you to four different places in the
Bible where, concerning synagogue attendance, it says that
Jesus went “as was his custom.” The only time we see him
biblically between nativity and thirty, he is in the Temple
experiencing something of a bar mitzvah. And in the last
corporate act of his life, he celebrates Passover. In
Matthew 16:18, Jesus refers to Peter as “Rock” and says:
“I’ll build my church upon you.” Roman Catholics assume
Jesus is talking about Peter the man, and suggest that
Jesus’ announcement establishes the papacy. Protestants say:
“No, that’s not right. Jesus is not building a church upon
who Peter is, but upon what Peter believes.” But that’s
not entirely right, either. Nowhere does Jesus say anything
about organizing the church, naming the church, setting
creedal boundaries for the church, or marketing the church.
There is no talk from Jesus about institutions. Only about
disciples (or followers). In this passage, the word
“church” is best defined as a gathering of followers. And
how will the followers (disciples) be identifiable? By the
love they have for one another (John 13:35). But
isn’t that what we are all trying to do….show love for one
another, I mean? None of us succeeding brilliantly. Many of us
failing miserably. But all of us, believing these to be our
marching orders institutionally. Still, if that’s what every
church is attempting, where (in contemporary culture) are
today’s shoppers gravitating? Simply put, people are
gravitating to churches that answer five basic questions. Let
me raise them in order of importance. First
question: Can you help us find meaning for our lives? And
when people ask this question, they are speaking very
personally and pragmatically….sometimes, even selfishly.
They are not so much interested in what the faith is, or even
what the faith says, so much as what the faith says to me….does
for me….comforts, assures, helps or heals me.
When people say, “I need religion” or “I guess it’s
time to get a little God in my life,” they are almost always
talking about a benefit they expect God to offer rather than a
challenge they expect God to deliver. And any time they talk
about the cross, the conversation has more to do with what
Jesus did on his than any expectation that we might carry
ours. But that’s all right. We can begin there. God can
begin there. So the successful church will apply the Gospel to
those life situations where questions of “meaning” are
being asked, and be responsive to folks at life’s
transitional and vulnerable moments (i.e., marriage,
childbirth, death). Which is why churches that want to grow
must do an excellent job with baptisms, weddings and funerals. Second
question: Can you help us raise our children?
And depending upon the age and life situation of the church
shopper, this may be the first question….the most important
question…. maybe even the only question. There is incredible
anxiety associated with parenting these days (more on this
next Sunday). So if a church has only so many dollars to spend
on staff, space and specific programs, does it tilt those
dollars toward kids or towards saints? It tilts them towards
kids. Which is so obvious in theory, but which happens so
seldom in practice. Third
question: Can you help us make friends?
Shoppers ask: “Can you link us with people who will learn
our story….people who will share their story….and people
with whom we can live our way into the faith’s story?” But
where it once was enough to provide associations (men’s
clubs, women’s clubs, teen’s clubs, senior citizen’s
clubs), people now crave connections. Very few people lack
associations (people to hang with). But most everybody lacks
for connections (people to get close to). We
have all kinds of groups here. We have groups gathered around
content (books, Bibles, curriculums, issues). We have groups
gathered around interests (singing, softball, walking,
aerobicizing). We have groups gathered around crises (grief,
divorce, addiction, depression). And we have groups gathered
around outreach (building, feeding, sheltering, tutoring). But
at the expanding edge are groups gathered around growing and
covenanting….groups which, while they may read a book,
pursue an interest, respond to a crisis or accept a mission,
see all of those things as extensions of the relationships
they develop with each other and the relationships they
develop with Jesus Christ. And it is to these latter groups
that more and more will gravitate because the need is greater
than the risk. Fourth
question: Are you big enough to be all things to all people?
More and more people are joining larger and larger churches.
Size counts because people want it all. And larger churches
are better able to provide it all. Whether big is “better”
is irrelevant. What “big” is perceived to be is
“wider,” “broader” and “more likely to accommodate
diversity.” Unfortunately, we are not talking about
diversity of age, race, class and culture, so much as we are
talking about diversity of activity. While small churches will
always have their niche, middle-sized churches will get
squeezed as big churches get bigger. And if big churches
don’t (get bigger, I mean), they’ll get squeezed, too. Fifth
question: You do understand, don’t you, that we expect
excellence? This is a
question that is perhaps more prevalent in this community than
elsewhere. Here, more than any place I have ever served,
people expect high quality, will pay for high quality, and
will fall away when quality begins to dip. One can no longer
assume that ties will be kept out of denominational identity,
loyalty to the pastor, or long-standing friendships within the
congregation. For many, a better model down the street will
erode all but the deepest loyalties. Unless the
church-shopping culture changes, churches will have to do more
and more, better and better. *
* * * * So
where will we go to church, Kris and I? We wish we knew. We
know we will quickly tire of bouncing hither and yon to check
out interesting sanctuaries or hear old friends preach. Nor
will we settle all ties here, although the necessity of
transferring loyalty will limit our activity for some time to
come (specifics to be added later). Our
kids are raised….no help needed there. Our grandkids,
nonexistent….no help needed yet. Programmatically, quality
will be more important than quantity. And, good soldiers that
we are, denominational loyalty will remain paramount. In other
words, we won’t bite the Methodist hand that feeds us. Preaching
will be important. Music, maybe even more so. And while my
heart is sufficiently satiated with “meaning,” my head
still hungers for stimulating. Meaning that I will probably
not frequent a church that asks me to put braces on my brains.
And while I have never played or studied tennis, I will expect
any church I attend to help me improve my serve. Which
brings Kris and me back to question three….the one about
friends and stories. More and more, it is clear to us that
while belief is a personal thing, faith is a shared thing. We
have never gone it alone. We have never done it alone. And
there is no way either of us believes we can survive alone. Romans
12:15 talks about the need to weep with those who weep and
rejoice with those who rejoice. But that’s not only
something we do and something we are, that’s something
we’ll need. Every day, somebody says to us: “So what are
you gonna miss?” The answer is becoming clearer and clearer.
“The people stuff, that’s what we’re gonna miss.” If
I’ve learned anything in the last forty years, it is this.
Faith is a relational thing more than it is a propositional
thing. Just before the sermon began, I read a line to you that
is truly amazing (Matthew 10:40): If
we receive each other, we receive Jesus. Just
think of that. For years, I always thought it was God, It
never occurred to me that maybe I had it backwards. Note:
My observations about church shopping, while corroborated by
forty years of pastoral observation, are grounded in the
research of any number of ecclesiastical sociologists, not the
least of which are Lyle Schaller, Loren Mead and George Barna. My
comments on “the seeking of excellence” may have been
strongly influenced by the communities I have served, but
there seems to be a general consensus that the expectations of
seekers are higher, across the board, than they have ever been
before. Certainly, in a community like Birmingham, others who
serve the public (especially school teachers and
administrators) would echo my sentiments and have anecdotal,
if not statistical, data to support my claim.
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